All play and no work make Jill a dull girl

Do you ever feel like you're being pleasantly co-opted by your friends and you never get any work done? That's been happening lately. I'm having lots of fun, but the residual guilt and stress from never getting enough work done around it is just getting to me. I've been going out for dinner and lunch almost every day. Unfortunately, I also have a ton of work right now; write-ups and studying and organizing for a free clinic and an 'aging-interest' student group. So I'm declaring the next few days my quiet time -- even though it's going to be Halloween, my favorite holiday of the year.

My birthday's coming up, and I think my biggest wish is a cup of tea, a good book, and a long nap. I also need to just slow down and take care of the basics, like tidy up, clean house, wash the car, buy groceries, that sort of thing. I've been out of my regular toothpaste for three days and am going through a travel size tube I had stashed away somewhere. I was thinking about throwing a Halloween party, but I just don't really want to. I'm not in a party mood, I'm in a curl-up-and-hibernate mood. Especially since the weather took a nosedive last night, and it's cold out. Beautiful, but cold. Last night, the cold was so soporific that I was sitting at my desk, trying to work, and Sleep just hit me. It was such a strong urge that I knew I'd either fall asleep in my chair or in bed, so I hit the sack.

My cat was being especially adorable yesterday in retaliation, since I spent the weekend out of town and away from her. She pilfered one of my political buttons and was batting it around the floor -- I think it said "No on Prop 4" or something -- and was batting it around the floor. Progressive kitty toys briefly with the idea of parental notification.

I really want to start riding again. I might try next semester, if my course schedule changes a little. It just makes life better. I called the stables for an evaluation, but they haven't called back. I think they close in winter; I'm not really sure. I miss the barn and the work and carrying heavy saddles around.

I saw a patient yesterday who was so sweet -- she called me 'honey' and 'sweetheart' and 'darling' etc. She was an elderly lady and seemed totally at ease, even comfortable, in the hospital. One of those people who is just not fazed by much. She was a pleasure to talk with. I was so tired that I don't think I did a stellar job, but she seemed happy, and hopefully I didn't say anything too offensive to the doctor I was working with (I made some jokes about being skinny and short, which may have backfired because of this doctor's physical attributes. Oops?). I think I'm finally starting to project a feeling of deserving to be there, which is a nice change from feeling really, really scared that I'm going to mess up or forget something totally important (which I did, but I've come to accept the fact that I'm learning and it will happen from time to time).

I'm having crampy retrosternal pain right now, so I'm either having a heart attack, hypokalemic from not eating enough bananas, or just thirsty and tired. Hopefully it's one of the latter two. I think that on Halloween, I'm going to go to a party if there is one, or else just stay at home with popcorn and hot chocolate and watch "Wait Till Dark" with Audrey Hepburn. Maybe I can coerce my boyfriend to do that with me? He probably will if I add apples. I usually love Halloween so much, and want to go out and party and get dressed up and have fun, but this year things have been kind of rough, and I've done my share of going out. I really just want to be a homebody, and maybe carve a pumpkin or try mirror divination:

A young lady seeks the face of her future husband in the mirror.

I should actually do something besides blog now. I miss having a life, and occasionally I'll try to have one, and then medical school will come crashing down to remind me that I've leased my soul to the establishment for right now. Hopefully it'll be a good investment.